Summer Time and The Grass is Burned

Judging by the amount of time it took me to gear up for this blog, I think my brain is as fried as the lawn.

I know I'm burned out and in dire need of a vacation, but there is no rest for the weary. I'm all in- my cards are on the table and I'm down to my last chips. I will not quit early, I won't pass out from heat stroke and I certainly will not whine about the long hours in front of the computer. It's all good, and it's all leading me in the right direction.

About three weeks ago, I quit my full-time job as director of Public Relations for a local college in order to focus on writing. (Can someone give me a WOO-HOO?) All my life I've wanted to be a writer. (Well, that and a professional basketball player. The way I figure it, one out of two isn't bad.) But for as long as I have been working, I've been earning my living; paying my bills, by NOT writing- by doing other marketing and communications work that wasn't at all as fulfilling. I justified continuing in this manner because, well, the utilities bill had to be paid and I needed gas in my car.

Then one day, I watched "The Secret" and I realized something very simple in theory, but life-changing for me. I realized that so long as I kept working and trying to write in my spare time, I was never putting it out to the universe that I EXPECTED to succeed at writing, that I was good enough to throw myself into it 125%, and be paid well for that work. So I made a change. The utilities bill still needs to be paid, and I still need gas in my car, but I never doubted I'd make money some other way.

And you know what? Now I'm actually getting pay checks to write. It's been a seamless transition. I might say I've been lucky, but that's not the truth. I've asked, and the universe is responding in kind.

When I get overtired and feeling sorry for myself (don't worry, it doesn't happen often), I think of the quote by Michael Jordan where he said "winners will do whatever it takes not to be losers, no matter how unpleasant the work of improving may be."

I've learned that writing is an awful lot like basketball. It's all about repetition, about doing the work when no one else is around. It's about putting in the time and willing myself to improve, to take the next step, even if I'm too exhausted to take another step.

Why are people so intimidated to work hard? Do do what is in their hearts?

If there is one thing I have learned these past few years it's that I know what kind of people I want in my life, and what people I want to work with. I want to be with people who inspire me, who have a light within them. People who still make shapes out of clouds and tell knock-knock jokes and love hard and strong and true- those are my people!

And so I'm writing. Every day. Sometimes for me, sometimes for other people and companies. I've finished a script based on the life of Emily Dickinson and I know that story came from somewhere down deep inside me, like the words flowed from some previously untapped well.

Now I've tapped the well. I know how to access it and I won't let that door close ever again. It's a new day. A new life for me. My list of things to do today puts it all in perspective:

1. Live in the moment.

2. Snuggle with my cats.

3. Play wiffle-ball with the dog.

4. Write for me.

5. Write for clients.

6. Meditate.

7. Workout.

8. Read one thing today that touches my soul.

9. Laugh.